All My Days
by Kelsh24
Summary: What if Anna had lived? What does the future look like for her and Severide? Will Kelly be strong enough to help her through? Or crack under the pressure? What could be next for them if she is able to fight? Will they ever get their happily ever after? Takes place from 5x19 on.
1. Wake of Devastation

**Summary:** What if Anna had lived? What does the future look like for her and Severide? Will Kelly be strong enough to help her through? Or crack under the pressure? What could be next for them if she is able to fight? Will they ever get their happily ever after? Takes place from 5x19 on.

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 **Chapter 1: Wake of Devestation**

 _Severide's POV_

There is nothing better or more terrifying than the feeling when you know you can't live without somebody. It's something I've let happen very few times in my life. When you get hurt for the first time when you're young...you tend to not really let anybody else in again. I mean, there was a time in my life when I thought I'd be with one person for the rest of my life. When that didn't happen...I closed myself off from it all. I never wanted to need somebody that much ever again. So, I didn't. I've spent most of my life relying on myself. It's hard to let go of all the baggage along the way. Yet, I've also relied on my friends. They've become my family in so many ways. And even when I don't deserve it...they're there. I don't think there is a single thing that Casey and I have been through that would stop us from being best friends at the end of the day. Although, I've learned the hard way that losing true friends also leads to a ton of heartache. Like the day that Shay was killed. Yet, if there is anything I learned from that day...it's that time is fleeting. While I've spent far too many days adrift since, I'm learning more and more lately that it's not the life that I want to live. And if not fate than I don't know what but everything changed for me. My negative thoughts about love and reliability ended the day I met Anna.

When Clarke first came to me about helping her, I hesitated more than a little. I didn't know how deep I'd want to get into a situation with somebody battling a life and death situation. I know, ironic right? That's saying a lot coming from a guy who makes a living saving people's lives. But when the call is over, that's it. There's no connection, it's just onto the next call. Yet, something about it all suddenly changed in me. The way I've lived my life is not something to be proud of. Each day that passes has seemed more and more like I needed something like this to come along. I needed to find a purpose and meaning in my life. I need to know that the life I am living is making a difference. The first day I met Anna, I couldn't believe how unbelievable she was. She had this light in her, that even through all of the horrible days, never went out. I don't think I've ever been in awe of anybody more in my life. I guess, with all she's been through you either choose to accept it or just drown in it all.

I never in a million years thought it as possible to fall for somebody so hard and so fast. That every thought I have is about Anna or how to include her even more in my life. It's pretty incredible if you ask me. Maybe it's just because I've never let myself feel this way before. I've usually run far from it before it could even possibly get to this point. But with Anna...everything is different. I see the world in this new light I never have before. And the craziest thing? I love it. I love the way she makes me feel. I don't think I've ever laughed or smiled more than when she's around. She makes me want to better...she makes me want to be enough. That's why what is happening now is so unfair. This isn't the way it's supposed to be. She doesn't deserve it. I risked everything I possibly could to save her life just a few months ago. The bone marrow transplant was supposed to be enough. She was supposed to get her life back. Afterwards, it seemed like she bounced back amazingly. So much so that the thought of her illness was pretty much gone. She moved to Chicago, started working at Med, and we've been pretty much inseparable. When she freaked out on me, I should have known. I should've know that this had to be it. She walked into that restaurant with this huge weight on her shoulders...something wasn't right. At first I thought it was about my dad. I would completely understand if she wanted to run from a future with another Benny Severide. Even I've tried to run from the possibility of turning into that. But that cold look in her beautiful eyes...something was seriously wrong.

I didn't run right after her...I don't even know why. I figured whatever was going on...she needed time to calm down. It wasn't until the next day that I started to put the pieces together. She wouldn't just give up on this new start. Her new job...this city...me. It didn't make sense, even if she was home sick she wouldn't do this to me. When I finally did realize what was happening...I felt my world fall apart. My heart was in my throat and I felt like I couldn't breathe. The entire ride to Springfield, I tried to find the right words to say to her. First off, I didn't know how bad this really was. But regardless there wasn't anything to say, because this shouldn't be happening. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. I had to find the strength somewhere deep inside of me to face Anna. But while I was alone...I had to let it all flow. My fear, pain, hearache...all of it. I can't lose her. She has quickly become my whole world. I'd do anything I could to help her. And whether or not she wanted me to be...I was gonna be there every day.

The pain and unbelievable fear in her was horrible. I've never seen her like this before. Even when things weren't going well before...she still had this attitude of whatever happens is meant to be. But now...the devastation just overtook her. Maybe it's because after everything she's been through, she actually thought all that was behind her. Maybe it's because her future is suddenly becoming less clear. But whatever it was, she was beyond defeated. She's pushing me away and the more she does...the more I feel like I need to step up. I need to be the one she can be vulnerable with. I need to be the one to help her fight. Whether or not she thinks she can beat this, I have to be the one to believe. I have to believe in faith and love and everything that can go right. I'm scared...I'll admit that much. I'm scared I'm not strong enough to go through all this with her again. I'm scared that she could be right and this prognosis is grim. Then, I'm not sure what I'd do. But I know it wouldn't be good. For right now, I just have to focus on right here and now. Whatever that turns out to be. Because there's really nothing I wouldn't sacrifice for Anna.


	2. Pull You To Safety

**Chapter 2: Pull You To Safety**

I've spent a long time trying to find a reason for so many things in my life. I've woken up far too many mornings, not liking the person looking back at me. I needed to feel something...anything. Just feel the need for life and adventure and love. I started to feel like maybe I'd never find any of those things. That I would just wake up each day and wonder through my now mundane life. One I was not so proud of. Suddenly, if not fate than I don't know what...led me straight to Anna's aid. Something I felt with everything in me. Something that pretty quickly took over all of me. It was what made my blood flow...making sure this amazing woman had a life to go back to. Suddenly and rather quickly, that seemed to happen. And then it turned into something more than I ever thought was possible. I could feel my feelings for her growing deeper and stronger with each passing day. Maybe it was our now connected bone marrow. Maybe it was something else. But whatever the reason, I knew in my heart and soul that I needed Anna in my life. Because I knew there had to be a reason she came into my life and I believe it was to save me. Surprisingly it seemed she felt that way too. Yet, she knew she had her own life waiting for her back in Springfield. So, with what I always believed was a heavy heart, she went back home. She left without saying goodbye, just leaving one word behind...someday. That someday broke every part of me. For one, I hated that I never got the chance to say goodbye. Another was that all I wanted was for someday to be today. For us to start something that could lead to an amazing life. After some surprising turn of events, I ended up in Springfield. All I wanted was run to her and make a case to give me just one chance. Just one moment...to be together. Yet, I guess I always knew Chicago was where I would always belong. Thankfully, she had a easier time following her heart. Which led her right to my door. She was able to leap before she looked...and give a chance for a new future. I have to tell you that is all I have ever wanted. Whether I was able to give up my own life here or not. And if I knew what I know now, I would have made sure we never wasted any of the time that we did. I would give up Chicago a million times over if it would give me those days back with Anna. Because now as I'm looking at our suddenly unclear future...all I want is time. I want the time we deserve to be together. To discover every last thing about each other. After everything we've been through, I guess I just thought we deserved some contentment and happiness. I should probably know better by now that obviously my life doesn't include any of those things. I just wish just for once I could get the happy ending. I could have a life with Anna that was simple and complete.

I'm fighting hard to find that strength she taught me from day one. I remember being in such awe of her when we first met. She was in really bad shape and things just kept going from bad to worse. But she never wavered in the strength she held. Maybe it was that she was sick for so long, it just became a part of who she was at that point. Maybe it was the fact that she had this amazing soul that made her the strongest woman I've ever known. I almost wish she could give me some of that now. Because even she is starting to break down under her new now even more dire circumstances. I can see her almost giving up. As if she is so defeated that there simply is no more fight in her. I understand that much. She finally was starting a new life that finally had a future...one a year ago she didn't know she'd ever have. As she breaks down in my arms, I wonder if I really can be the rock she needs now. I find myself with tears running down my face right along with her. I can't lose Anna. I can't even think of the possibility of my world without her. So as hard as all this is going to be, I have to convince her to give herself one more chance. To fight the hardest fight of her life. And come out the other side with the same grace and dignity she's always had. Whether that scares her or not.

"Hey, everything is going to be fine. I promise." I tell her, and she pulls back still holding tight onto my hands, looking into my eyes.

"You can't make those kind of promises, Kelly."

"I can if you try to fight this. You have to promise me first."

"Kelly...I've fought for a long time. I don't know if I have it in me to do it all over again."

"You do. You know what's different this time around?"

"What's that?"  
"You have me. And I'm not going anywhere, Anna. I will be here every step of the way."

"Kelly, I don't want to put you through all of this. It's ugly and my outcome will probably be bad."

"Hey, stop it. We are in this together, okay? I don't care how bad it gets. You are never getting rid of me."

"You don't understand."

"Then help me."

"Kelly...even if I do find a treatment plan, it will probably be just that. It won't be a cure...it will just maintain the disease. I obviously was never really doing better."

"That's not true. You know you were remisson after the transplant. I saw the results myself. And then after, you started to live your life. And for just a little while, you forgot you were ever sick...that's okay. And you have the right be angry now...hell, I'm angry. You don't deserve this. But it's happening...so we need to move quickly."

"I promise you don't want to see me like this. You don't want to watch me fade away."

"That's not going to happen."

"How can you be okay with this?"

"I'm not. I'm just dealing with what is. You do remember that we met because you were sick, right?"

"Yeah, but that was different."

"No, it isn't. I just have an even greater reason to fight for you now."

"You fought hard enough the first time. And you ended up in a lot of pain because of it."

"Maybe just a little, but we came out the other side better than I ever could have imagined. And this time...I care about you more than anything in this world, Anna. I am not going to give up on you. I will stand by you no matter what."

"My prognosis isn't good."

"I don't care about a prognosis. You know why? Because I believe in us. I believe that whatever connection and strength brought us together to begin with...will help us through now. And I believe that you can overcome this again because you are so strong. Stronger than I can ever hope to be."

"I'm not."

"Then I'll help you...we can help each other. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."

"You're amazing." She tells me, wrapping her arms around my neck once again. Holding on even tighter now, tears streaming down her face. We stay like that for a few more minutes, just not wanting to move. Just wanting to stop time and maybe just wake up from this nightmare. "Okay...let's go back to Chicago."

"That's exactly what I wanted to hear."

"I'm scared nothing is going to help me, Kelly."

"Don't be afraid. You've got amazing doctors and I think we're going to beat this for good this time."

"I want to believe that, but..."

"Then do. Don't think about all the bad things. Don't go to that dark place, I know that doesn't help anything."

"I know, but I can't help it."

"I know. But I have faith that everything is going to be fine. And if you feel that overwhelming fear taking over...just reach for this hand. And I promise I will be there to pull you to safety." I tell her, entwining her hand in mine.

"You're an incredible man, Kelly Severide. Okay. I'm ready...let's do this."

"Let's do this."

As we drove back to Chicago, the fear and pain we both felt was more than evident. But that didn't stop us from feeling the need to stay together and find the strength in each other to power through this storm. She's right, I don't what is going to happen. I don't know the kind of road she's facing. On the outside it seems grim and that scares me more than anything. This woman has rather quickly taken my whole heart. She has made me scared of a future I never was before. She makes me want to be better and stronger than I've ever been. More than anything, she makes me want to the man she can lean on forever. I want to know that I can be that person. I want to know she's going to survive this. I want to know that we have all of forever to learn every single thing about each other. I want to believe in love and faith to pull us through. Because whether I've ever said the words or not...I love Anna. I love her with every single part of me. I am _in_ love with Anna. And knowing that, that is what is going to make the difference. That is what is going to give me the strength to push her to the other side. I've never admitted or felt this way before. I just want to feel like this for the rest of my life. And I want a life and a future with Anna. I know all of that is not enough to kill this disease in her. But I do believe it's what is going to make the fight worth fighting.


	3. No Regrets

Chapter 3: No Regrets

 **Anna's POV**

You know there is something absolutely terrifying about knowing that your life could be over. I almost think it would be better to never know you were dying at all. At least for the person...not for the ones left behind. Now I'm not saying that I'm actively dying or anything, but it sure feels like things keep going from bad to worse for me. I feel like my world is crumbling around me and I can't stop it. After I had the bone marrow transplant and was finally released from the hospital, I started to feel human again. For so long, my illness took over my entire life. For over a year, it was just treatment after treatment and an end just never seemed possible. So afterwards, I swear there was this point where I forgot I was ever sick at all. My mind just wanted me to move forward and not dwell on that awful time in my life. I moved to Chicago and was starting to really try to build a life here. It's what I wanted and for the first time I was truly happy and content. I don't think I've ever felt as a deep connection to anybody in my life as I do to Kelly. He saved my life. He fought harder than I ever thought or expected him to do. I guess I've just never had somebody care so much about me before. I know they say that bone marrow donation is supposed to be this selfless act. But what Kelly did for me was above and beyond it all. And I'll always be grateful for what he was willing to sacrifice. I just expected him to take care of his own injuries and look the other way. But I've learned rather quickly that _can't_ is not in Kelly Severide's vocabulary.

Over the past eight weeks, he has done everything in his power to help me feel comfortable and at home in Chicago. I'll admit, it was an adjustment at first. My decision to uproot my life to take a chance on Kelly was a tad impulsive to say the least. My family and friends thought I was truly losing my mind. But I didn't care. For once in my life, I wanted to do something crazy and rash. I've spent most of my life planning things and doing exactly what I thought I was supposed to. But then, I got sick and I realized rather quickly that I could no longer plan for tomorrow because maybe I didn't have one. Then, somewhat miraculously, I overcame my diagnosis. After being told there was a good possibility that would never happen, I actually went into remission. And suddenly...tomorrow and next month, next year was actually possible. And I felt like if not now...then when? I told Kelly someday. As I drove back to Springfield that day, I knew I left a piece of my heart back in Chicago. But I had to try and reclaim the life I once had. He didn't take that lying down though and challenged me on when someday would start. And then one day I realized I wanted that day to be today just as much as he did. What if all this was meant to be? What if I let him go and never got a second chance? What if this was truly my destiny? Because the chances of me finding my very rare match in this world was about a million to one, I was told. But then I looked up one day...and there he was. Turns out, we really are a perfect match. In more than one sense of the word.

Out of the blue, during what was supposed to be routine blood work, I was diagnosed with Leukemia once again. Only this time, it was worse. It came back hard and fast, spreading outside of the bone marrow. This time there was no cure...I was going to die. Nobody had to say the words, I've seen it a hundred times in my patients. Management, which is really just doctor talk for hospice, was the only solution. The new life that I was trying to build suddenly was being taken away from me. Everything that could have been was over now. I didn't have a future and pretty soon it was all going to be over. All I could think about in that moment was Kelly's face. The pain and fear he would have...the fight he'd put up. I couldn't put him through that. I couldn't have him watch me die in front of him. It wasn't fair to him. So, I tried leaving..maybe just breaking his heart would be easier than anything else. Of course, he didn't take that well at all. He knew something was wrong and he confronted me. The look in his eyes, you could see that light he's always had, go out in one instant after learning my prognosis. And as optimistic as he is trying to be, his pain is so strong right now. I've realized so quickly that this man in front of me is the real deal. He is seriously the greatest person I've ever known. And if there is anything I'm going to take with me when I slip away...It's that compassion and love he has shown me every day. Even now, after all I've put him through, he's willing to fight for me and what could be even though I'm scared to do it myself. I know things are bad and I don't see that changing. I'm trying to look up even just a little for his sake. But I'm not sure it's going to do any good. I want him to remember us happy for the little time we were. I wish I had the rest of forever to make all the memories that we could possibly deserve. Unfortunately that doesn't look like it's in the forecast for us. Yet, I walked back in Chicago Med yesterday to begin a new round of treatment. I'm not sure it will do any good. But if Kelly is willing to be by my side through it all, then I owe it to him to at least try and fight. I'm tired of it all to honest. But as I look into his eyes, I can't help but want to come out the other side. I want this life with him, whatever that could turn out to be. Because I love Kelly. I love him like I've never loved anybody before. It's the dream I always prayed for, but figured would never happen for me. Which is what is causing me to want to beat this...more than ever.

"Kelly..." I say, opening my eyes and see him sitting upright next to me. A spot I haven't seen him move in hours. "You have to go home. You need sleep."

"I told you, I'm not going anywhere."

"Don't act crazy now."

"Crazy is a relative term. I've always been crazy, you can't knock it out of me now."

"Yeah, I guess I've known that since the day I met you."

"Exactly. How are you feeling?"

"Tired. More tired than I remember from last time. But maybe I've just been trying to block that time out of my mind, so I don't remember. And slightly nauseous. But other than that, just wonderful."

"I'm sorry...wish I could help you more."

"You are helping me. You're here, that's all I need from you." I tell him, grasping his hand tightly. "Hey, I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"All of it. Running away...not being honest with you."

"Anna..."

"No, I owe it to you at this point not to act like that. But I just don't want you to see me like this. I want you to remember me the way I was before."

"That is always how I've always seen you. Sick or not...you are the same strong, confident, insanely passionate woman you've always been and always will be."

"Kel...we never got to our cabin getaway."

"Don't you worry about that. We are going to have plenty of time for that once you get better."

"Kelly..."

"We are going to have so many adventures together. You know, I've searched my whole life for a girl that wanted to go hiking and fishing and camping with me. You're not gonna leave me to continue doing all that alone, are you?"

"I sure hope not. Because that sounds really good about now."

"Me too. It will be amazing. And I don't know if anybody ever told you, but I don't do all that well on my own."

"Yeah, I could tell that much. But Kelly, you promised me you'd stay in the moment."

"I am."

"Okay, well right now it's a day by day kind of thing. I don't want you looking for a future we can never have."

"Anna..." He says, turning completely serious. Looking deep into my eyes, tears slightly welling up in his. "I have faith that on the other side of all this is an amazing future. I don't know what it will entail. But all I know is it's you and me...and that is all that will ever matter."

"I wish I could have the optimisum you do."

"Truth is I'm scared, Anna. I'm scared of what's going to happen tomorrow or next week. But I know that whatever happens we will have fought as hard as we possibly could. And whatever life throws at us, we'll be okay. No regrets."

"No regrets."

I can tell that Kelly is trying so hard to be strong, but under the surface this intense break down is brewing. Right now, I can't help him because I know how much my own strength is diminished. I feel like the last time I had so much more strength. I used to feel like whatever happened was meant to be. Like there was this big plan mapped out for me and I was just taking the journey. I didn't know where it would lead me but whatever happened...happened. There was nothing I could do to change that. Because you can't change destiny. This time around, I feel defeated already. Maybe I'm weaker this time. Maybe it's because the disease is affecting more parts of me. Maybe it's because every time I open my eyes, I see the man I love breaking right in front of me. Whether he knows it or not...he can't always be the strong one. I know he's had a hard time letting people in to his world. Because he's always afraid that whatever happiness he feels will be taken away in an instant. I know because I've felt the same exact way. Then we found each other and it seemed like the puzzle was complete. For the first time in my life, I let my walls come down and let him into my heart. Now, I just want the chance for us to complete each other always. For the first time I know I have that other half waiting for me when I come out of all this. Knowing that is everything. I don't want it taken away either. I just hope that love and strength and whatever power is controlling our tortured lives here...is enough. It has to be enough from now until forever. That scares me to talk this way, but my furture is so unclear that I have to. Even if I don't wake up tomorrow...I'll know I experienced a once in a lifetime love. That even though there are a million things we never did, I let my heart control me for even just this little while and there is no greater feeling in this world.


	4. You're My Hero

Chapter 4: You're My Hero

 **Anna's POV**

Sometimes it's the little things that make a life worthwhile. It's a scary thought to know that there is only a number of moments before your life is over. And it's only then, that you realize how special each and every one has been. Even the bad days seem good. Yet, when it's all said and done you have to wonder one thing...how will I be remembered? It's something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I guess I have no choice, do I? As optimistic as I want or need to be right now, the odds are stacked against me. This is worse than it was the first time and my options for treatment are very few and far between. I know exactly how it will go. They'll try some Chemo, maybe radiation...it will stop the progression for a little while. But in the end I think my outcome will be the same. It will just be a matter of how long this will ward off the inevitable. I've seen this a million times, in my job, and I believe there have only been two cases that I had where my patients came out the other side. That's all I keep thinking about as I lay here waiting for the pre-med's to run their course and they start the next dose of Chemo. I know I shouldn't be thinking about things this way. I should be thinking about the really great moments of my life. The ones that made me who I am. The ones that made me laugh and be excited to live each day. But those memories are starting to get lost in the deep depths of my mind. It's just I've never been so scared before. Even when I felt like my days were numbered, the first time, I never actually thought I was going to die. I knew there had to be a miracle left out there for me. That I had more things left to do one this planet. If god knew that, then I had to make it through. I had to find a match and then everything would go back to the way it was before all this happened. I would go back to my job, my hobbies, my life. It just had to happen that way...there was no other option. As if my prayers had been answered I got just that. I got the transplant and I got to go back to my life. It was a little different than I remembered it...but it was mine. And while there were some things that were forever changed, I was going to make the most of the time I was given back. That is the real reason I moved to Chicago. I wanted to make sure there wasn't a second I was missing out on. I didn't ever want to look back and be staring regrets in the face.

Kelly Severide is a one of kind man. He is caring, loving, strong, and passionate to a fault. I've never met anybody like him in my life. The way he's standing by me, even though his heart is breaking, is incredible. I tried to push him out of my life, if that could protect him from watching me slip away. I know what it's like to watch somebody die in front of you, and I don't want that to be the last memory he has of me. I want him to remember the happiness we've been able to have these past few months. I want him to be able to look back and say we did these things together and they were great. Every moment was lived to the fullest. Now, I'm afraid that the only memories that will be left are these. The ones where he sits by my bedside as I get weaker. I don't want that for him. I want him to happy. I want him to hold onto the good things. But there is one thing that Kelly will never do...give up. Even if it's not realistic, he's not going to stop fighting until the very last moment. I just know him. That's kind of crazy how well I do actually. I haven't known him all that long, but I feel like it's I've known him my entire life. I feel like we have this connection that deepens with each passing day that I just can't explain. I wish I had all the time in the world with him. I wish I had met him at a different time in my life. One when I actually had one to move forward towards. The love I feel for this man is one that I will never be able to explain. But something I will forever hold with me. And if tomorrow or next week, next month I take my last breath...I'll know I have lived a full life. I've lost...made mistakes...guarded my heart, was afraid to take chances and seize opportunities sure...but what will matter is I have loved. I have completely with my whole heart loved with every part of me. As I look into his eyes, I know this is what everybody has always been talking about. The kind of love that makes your heart skip a beat and happy to open your eyes into somebody else's. I wish I had the rest of forever to do just that. But since I don't, I'll take the short time I do have. Because I know that is the greatest thing I have ever done.

"Hey, Anna...how are you feeling?" Dr. Brown asks, entering my room.

"The same. Tired, nauseous...much weaker."

"Yeah, these high doses of Chemo aren't going to stop that anytime soon. I'm sorry, I did order a higher dose of Zofran for today. Hopefully it will help."

"Thanks, Doctor. So, what's the verdict?"

"What?"

"Well, by the look on your face...you have something to say."

"Not really. Your numbers do look pretty good, considering."

"But?"

"But if you would be open to it, I would like to consider a few other options in addition to the Chemo."

"Do I have any other options?"

"Fortunately, you do."

"Which are what?"

"Well, I think you are could be an excellent candidate for immunotherapy."

"Isn't that what the bone marrow transplant was?"

"Well, sort of yes but there are some other options."

"Because I know that a second one probably wouldn't help."

"That is true, we rarely do a second transplant when the first one did cause a relapse. But not something that we would rule out completely if it came to that."

"Don't say that in front of Kelly. He'll be signing a consent faster than you can blink."

"That is true. Where is he by the way?"

"Went to get some coffee. He's hovering a little, I suggested taking a walk."

"It's sweet that he care so much."

"Sweet...annoying, whatever. No, I really am grateful to have him here."

"Alright, so I will tell you that there are no guarantees. But something that I believe would probably be an option to help you...you heard of Monoclonal Antibody?"

"A little bit. You take antibodies from me and create a protein, right?"

"Yes. We take them out, go down to the lab and create these antigens that should attach themselves to your abnormal cancer cells and block the activity. In doing so, hopefully kills off the disease. Since it is targeted therapy I think it's a good possibility you could be a good candidate."

"You would do this in conjunction with the chemo or in place of it?"

"Normally I would stop it and see if you respond to the antibody treatment."

"Normally?"

"With you I do want to continue with the treatments, at least for the next few weeks or so if you decide to do this. With how quickly you relapsed and had the metastasis...I don't want to take any chances."

"I understand."

"Now, I will say you do have a second option you can consider as well. But probably something we'd have to talk to Kelly about."

"Talk to me about what?" Kelly asks, reentering my room.

"Um...Dr. Brown was just discussing some other options I can consider for treatment."

"Are there other things that can be done?"

"Sort of. As I was explaining to Anna there is one that will use her own antibodies to stop the growth of the cells."

"Okay, then why aren't you doing it?"

"Well, it is a little more complicated than the chemo is. And I want her to have a few choices."

"There's more than one treatment you can be doing?"

"Possibly. There is this therapy, but as I was just about to explain to Anna there is another option which does have less side effects than both the chemo and the antibody treatment. And since you are her original bone marrow donor...would need you to work."

"I thought you said she wouldn't respond to another transplant? Because if she will, get me down to that OR."

"Kelly, can you let the doctor explain everything first?"

"Of course, go on." Kelly says, sitting down beside me taking my hand in his.

"Okay so, no you most likely would not respond to a second transplant of the stem cells. It's been done, but the outcome is pretty much the same. But something else that we can do is called donor lymphocyte infusion. Basically we would take lymphocytes from you and transplant them in Anna."

"What does that mean?"

"Lymphocyte is a type of white cell as opposed to the stem cells you've already given her. The point of it is to attack and hopefully suppress her leukemia cells. I've seen it be successfully done in relapsed patients after the bone marrow transplant has failed."

"Why didn't you tell us this from the beginning? If this can cure her, sign me up right now."

"Kelly, I never said cure."

"I know you never say that. You never say anything to give even a little bit of hope to her, do you?"

"Kelly, stop it. These are options I didn't even realize I was a candidate for, okay?"

"Look, I will leave you two to discuss what you would like to do next. Because of the metastasis...there's no guarantee. Alright I'll come back once the Chemo's done, okay?"

"Sounds good. Thank you, Doctor." I tell him, as he walks out of the room. "Kelly, you need to take a breath, okay?"

"I know, I'm sorry. I just really want this to work."

"Me too." I tell him, and look into his eyes. You can tell his hope has returned and in some ways I don't like that. Because if this doesn't work, he'll be more devastated ever. "So, besides what you can do I can have them take these antibodies from me and create this serum that I have heard works really well."

"Better than me donating?"

"I don't know. I think the treatment is a few weeks worth. The lymphocyte is done the same way as the bone marrow...same day, next day whatever."

"Look, you know way more than I ever will about all this. But I became your donor to begin with to save your life. I'm sorry I couldn't do that for you."

"Kelly..."

"But, Anna maybe this is the second chance. Maybe this time I can give you a life to go back to."

"Kelly, stop. You _did_ save my life. And in doing so ever since, you have given me an amazing life. One I didn't have six months ago. Whatever happens good, bad or otherwise...will have been for something."

"It's up to you, Anna. It's your life. Just tell me what to do."

"Well, they're gonna continue with the Chemo regardless."

"Really? Why?"

"Because of how quickly I relapsed. But if you do this again...it will probably be for the next few days or a week...and then lower doses and radiation after."

"Do you want me to do this? Because I want to help you. Anna, I love you. You know how much I love you...and I need you."

"I need you too. I do want you to do this, Kelly. But under one condition."

"What's that?"

"You have to promise me that you won't go out and get yourself hurt this time? I mean, I know the thrill and excitement of whether I would make it through was fun and all the first time."

"I am not going anywhere. I'm gonna take some ferlo and stay right here."

"Kelly, I don't want you to do that."

"Please, I have built up years worth and never taken any time. But now I realize how important it is to be here with you. I told you...you're not getting rid of me. So, is this done the same way as the bone marrow? Because I think I might take the anesthesia this time around if it is."

"I bet you would. But no, it's actually done more like a blood donation. Similar to if you donated platelets. They're going to take the blood out, separate the white and red cells and return the whole blood back to you."

"Oh, it's like cleansing my blood. That has to be good for me."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever you say. And I mean, if it doesn't work then I'll go to plan B...but if you want..."

"I do. I want us to have a life to go back to. And after all, I am your perfect match."

"Yeah, I guess you really are. You're my hero, Kelly Severide."

"That's been my favorite role to have yet." He tells me, leaning in to kiss me.

Knowing that I have more than one option to at least prolong whatever is going to happen is incredible. I knew about these treatments but was afraid to even ask about them, thinking my disease was too far gone. But now, for the first time since getting the prognosis...I feel this sense of hope. I know that the road is still a long way to go. And I don't want to think about what happens if this doesn't help me...but I have this incredible life to look forward to. Every day I spend with Kelly by my side...I know whatever happens everything is working out exactly the way it's supposed to. Because he gives me a strength I never knew I had. I've reached deep inside myself to fight through. If there comes a day I can no longer do that, then so be it. But right now, I have this new motivation to beat all this. In the beginning I was told if I made it, it would be one in a million. I've realized rather quickly that with my strength and Kelly's help...that maybe I really am that one. And I have to tell you, I feel like maybe I have a future after all. There's no better feeling than that...at least I haven't found one if there is.


End file.
